I don't know what kind of access Michael Vick has had to newspapers, magazines and the Internet in prison, but it seems like the news that he is no longer a hot commodity has not yet filtered down to Michael Vick.
In papers he submitted to a bankruptcy court, Vick indicated that he plans on making $10 million per season, which I'm pretty sure would be a record for an ex-con who had a career quarterback rating of 75.7 when he went away. From the Atlanta Journal Constitution:
The embattled Atlanta Falcons quarterback is hoping to earn as much as $10 million a year or more, according to court filings in his bankruptcy case. Under the plan he submitted to the court, Vick would keep the first $750,000 of his annual income over the next five years. After that, a percentage would go to his creditors based on a sliding scale. [...]
In a March 4 court filing, Vick’s attorneys say he “has every reason to believe upon his release, he will be reinstated into the NFL, resume his career and be able to earn a substantial living.”
“He is hopeful to play quarterback,” Daniel Meachum, an attorney and business manager for Vick, said in an interview. “There is no person with his talent in that position in all the league.”
That may have been true at one time, but there are also no quarterbacks in the league who have spent the last nine months sitting in a jail cell and eating prison food. I'm not a nutritionist or anything, but I'm pretty sure that's not what NFL team doctors would recommend for keeping a guy in optimum game shape.
I, of course, had to comment. This article is getting a ton of buzz. I couldn't find my comment to post here there is so much activity. Ultimately, I think my Dad is right, Vick will be too old and too out of shape to be competitive. Whether he has worked out in prison or not, he has been limited in what he can do. I think his ego is too big, and he hasn't learned his lesson. I think he believes he is the victim here and will think it until he dies, and that is too bad. Truly, he could do some good. Someone commented that dog fighting has gone on for decades and still goes on. That doesn't make it right, doesn't make it any more legal, and certainly doesn't give someone the opportunity to go back to their lifestyle when they have received their proverbial slap on the wrist. I will repeat myself, he ran this operation for seven years, knowing it was illegal, knowing it was a felony, and knowing it became federal when he crossed state lines, and he did anyway. He was beyond cruel and he is a menace to society. I really hope he never plays again, but he probably will.
Tuesday, March 31, 2009
How's this for a grandiose thought...
I've ordered some things from Hazeldon for our group. As we start discussing new topics or working new study programs, Hazeldon seems to have the most comprehensive study guides to help us. As a result I have received some emails regarding becoming an addiction counselor. It somewhat appeals to me as a choice of profession because it is one way to give back what was given to me. However, I'm still an alcoholic with an alcoholic mind, whether I'm drinking or not, and therefore prone to grandiose thoughts that I am able to keep in check today because I am sober. Thank you God.
So here's the latest grandiose thought: Study to become an addiction counselor, get certified and go to work for Crossroads Center in Antigua (Eric Clapton's recovery clinic), write my books on the beach in my spare time, and give back to the world what I received.
Who knows what grandiose thought may become a goal that is possible to achieve because through the grace of Good Orderly Direction, my group, and my support system, I am sober again today.
So here's the latest grandiose thought: Study to become an addiction counselor, get certified and go to work for Crossroads Center in Antigua (Eric Clapton's recovery clinic), write my books on the beach in my spare time, and give back to the world what I received.
Who knows what grandiose thought may become a goal that is possible to achieve because through the grace of Good Orderly Direction, my group, and my support system, I am sober again today.
Sunday, March 29, 2009
Big issues
A friend celebrated five years sobriety this morning. He described a friend of his who has struggled and lost his battle. This friend is going back to prison, and will likely be there the rest of his life. In the process, he wrecked several lives along with his own. I am sorry for his friend, I understand how hard it is to fight that battle, and to really understand my only hope of victory is complete surrender. Alcohol brought me to my knees over and over and over again, and it almost took me from this world, I have no doubt. It took a lot for me to understand that there are significant consequences for my actions (my Dad used that phrase frequently while I was growing up, and I finally get it...I'm a little slow).
I hear those stories of failure and as bad as I feel for that person, it reminds me that today because I'm sober I have choices. My big issue this morning was whether to go ahead and sign up for a writing seminar in Gunnison in June. It's the end of the month, rent is due, and I'm going to just make it. So I decided no. Then I looked again, and decided that yes, I can swing it despite my abysmal budgeting techniques, the money is there and I have the choice today to participate. So I will.
I hear those stories of failure and as bad as I feel for that person, it reminds me that today because I'm sober I have choices. My big issue this morning was whether to go ahead and sign up for a writing seminar in Gunnison in June. It's the end of the month, rent is due, and I'm going to just make it. So I decided no. Then I looked again, and decided that yes, I can swing it despite my abysmal budgeting techniques, the money is there and I have the choice today to participate. So I will.
Saturday, March 28, 2009
Pet accidents
(CNN) -- Dogs and cats soothe the soul and provide companionship, but a report released this week suggests they sometimes cause broken bones and sprains, too.
Most data on human-pet relationships have been devoted to the health benefits, such as lower blood pressure.
The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention estimates that every year, more than 86,000 fall injuries are caused by pets. Dogs are the biggest culprits, causing 88 percent of the injuries. Cats cause 11.7 percent of the falls, according to the Morbidity and Mortality Weekly Report.
CDC researchers formulated the national estimates based on data from 66 emergency rooms.
"Many of them occurred while people were walking their dog or chasing either their dog or cat," said Judy Stevens, an epidemiologist with the CDC's National Center for Injury Prevention and Control. "Over half the injuries with dogs were either falls or tripping over the pet or they were pushed or pulled by the pet."
Pets can suddenly rush to the door or scurry around the owners' feet, causing these accidents, experts said.
At least once a week, a patient injured by an overexcited dog or an unexpected chew toy walks into the office of Dr. Leon S. Benson, an orthopedic surgeon and chief of hand surgery at the NorthShore University HealthSystem in Evanston, Illinois. These patients often have wrist fractures after falling on an outstretched hand.
You would think I would have the strongest abs and back muscles on the planet from bending over and picking up Callie's toys so I don't trip over them in the middle of the night! I don't worry about Abbie injuring me, she's too busy tripping over herself! :-)
Most data on human-pet relationships have been devoted to the health benefits, such as lower blood pressure.
The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention estimates that every year, more than 86,000 fall injuries are caused by pets. Dogs are the biggest culprits, causing 88 percent of the injuries. Cats cause 11.7 percent of the falls, according to the Morbidity and Mortality Weekly Report.
CDC researchers formulated the national estimates based on data from 66 emergency rooms.
"Many of them occurred while people were walking their dog or chasing either their dog or cat," said Judy Stevens, an epidemiologist with the CDC's National Center for Injury Prevention and Control. "Over half the injuries with dogs were either falls or tripping over the pet or they were pushed or pulled by the pet."
Pets can suddenly rush to the door or scurry around the owners' feet, causing these accidents, experts said.
At least once a week, a patient injured by an overexcited dog or an unexpected chew toy walks into the office of Dr. Leon S. Benson, an orthopedic surgeon and chief of hand surgery at the NorthShore University HealthSystem in Evanston, Illinois. These patients often have wrist fractures after falling on an outstretched hand.
You would think I would have the strongest abs and back muscles on the planet from bending over and picking up Callie's toys so I don't trip over them in the middle of the night! I don't worry about Abbie injuring me, she's too busy tripping over herself! :-)
Thursday, March 26, 2009
(CNN) -- Connie and Donald McCracken were watching CNN one evening last week when they learned of the tragic death of actress Natasha Richardson from a head injury. Immediately, their minds turned to their 7-year-old daughter, Morgan, who was upstairs getting ready for bed.
Two days earlier, Morgan, her father, and brother had been playing baseball in the yard of their Mentor, Ohio, home when her father hit a line drive that landed just above Morgan's left temple. A lump formed, but the McCrackens iced it down and the swelling subsided within an hour.
"For the next two days, she was perfectly fine," Donald McCracken says. "She had no symptoms. She went to school both days and got an A on her spelling test as usual. There were no issues whatsoever."
But after hearing about Richardson's death, the McCrackens wondered if Morgan was really as OK as she seemed. After all, Richardson had been talking and lucid immediately after her fatal injury.
When they went upstairs to kiss Morgan good night, she complained of a headache. "Because of Natasha, we called the pediatrician immediately. And by the time I got off the phone with him, Morgan was sobbing, her head hurt so much," McCracken says.
The McCrackens took Morgan to the emergency room at LakeWest Hospital in neighboring Willoughby, where doctors ordered a CT scan and immediately put Morgan on a helicopter to Rainbow Babies and Children's Hospital in Cleveland, with her father by her side.
"I knew it was bad when she had to get there by helicopter in six minutes, instead of the 30 minutes it would have taken to get to Cleveland in an ambulance," McCracken said.
When the helicopter arrived at Rainbow, the McCrackens were greeted by Dr. Alan Cohen, the hospital's chief of pediatric neurosurgery. He whisked Morgan into the operating room, pausing for a moment to tell McCracken that his daughter had the same injury as Richardson: an epidural hematoma.
McCracken remembers standing in the emergency room, feeling like the life had just been sucked out of him. "My heart sank," he says. "It just sank."
Unlike Richardson's, Morgan's story has a happy ending. After surgery and five days in the hospital, she's at home and doing fine. "Dr. Cohen told us that if we hadn't brought her in Thursday night, she never would have woken up," McCracken says.
Now the McCrackens sometimes wonder if they waited too long to get Morgan to a doctor. After hearing about Richardson's death, many people are asking themselves the same question: Do all head injuries need attention, even ones that seem minor?
"Sometimes there's a gray zone, and there's no right answer," Cohen says.
In most cases, it's pretty clear when someone needs medical attention after a head injury, says Greg Ayotte, a spokesperson for the Brain Injury Association of America and a cognitive rehabilitation therapist. "They're confused, they're agitated, or they might be dizzy or unresponsive," he says.
But then there's what doctors call the "talk and die" scenario, where someone seems fine, only to die hours, or sometimes even days later.
"Talk and die" can happen with several different kinds of brain injuries. In the case of epidural hematomas, the injury Richardson and Morgan had, blood pools in the area between the lining of the brain and the skull. "Fluid is building up in a contained space, creating pressure. Something's got to give, and that something is the brain," Ayotte says. If you don't get to the hospital to have surgery to drain the fluid, "the deterioration can happen very quickly."
This is where I feel lucky. I had a head injury six years ago. I hit my head so hard that I created a skull fracture so the blood had somewhere to drain, but I had months of rehabilitation and still have some problems with my vision and vestibular system. The best way it was explained to me is that if the blood is not drained it pools in your head, which is your bodies CPU, and shuts it down, sometimes quickly, sometimes slowly. It took famed Dr. Atkins 18 months to die from a closed head injury. I'm glad that Megan is alright, and I disagree with Dr. Cohen. There is no grey area. Head injuries have to be looked at, and if nothing is wrong, all the better, but letting them go can spell death. As a parent, I couldn't live with that.
Two days earlier, Morgan, her father, and brother had been playing baseball in the yard of their Mentor, Ohio, home when her father hit a line drive that landed just above Morgan's left temple. A lump formed, but the McCrackens iced it down and the swelling subsided within an hour.
"For the next two days, she was perfectly fine," Donald McCracken says. "She had no symptoms. She went to school both days and got an A on her spelling test as usual. There were no issues whatsoever."
But after hearing about Richardson's death, the McCrackens wondered if Morgan was really as OK as she seemed. After all, Richardson had been talking and lucid immediately after her fatal injury.
When they went upstairs to kiss Morgan good night, she complained of a headache. "Because of Natasha, we called the pediatrician immediately. And by the time I got off the phone with him, Morgan was sobbing, her head hurt so much," McCracken says.
The McCrackens took Morgan to the emergency room at LakeWest Hospital in neighboring Willoughby, where doctors ordered a CT scan and immediately put Morgan on a helicopter to Rainbow Babies and Children's Hospital in Cleveland, with her father by her side.
"I knew it was bad when she had to get there by helicopter in six minutes, instead of the 30 minutes it would have taken to get to Cleveland in an ambulance," McCracken said.
When the helicopter arrived at Rainbow, the McCrackens were greeted by Dr. Alan Cohen, the hospital's chief of pediatric neurosurgery. He whisked Morgan into the operating room, pausing for a moment to tell McCracken that his daughter had the same injury as Richardson: an epidural hematoma.
McCracken remembers standing in the emergency room, feeling like the life had just been sucked out of him. "My heart sank," he says. "It just sank."
Unlike Richardson's, Morgan's story has a happy ending. After surgery and five days in the hospital, she's at home and doing fine. "Dr. Cohen told us that if we hadn't brought her in Thursday night, she never would have woken up," McCracken says.
Now the McCrackens sometimes wonder if they waited too long to get Morgan to a doctor. After hearing about Richardson's death, many people are asking themselves the same question: Do all head injuries need attention, even ones that seem minor?
"Sometimes there's a gray zone, and there's no right answer," Cohen says.
In most cases, it's pretty clear when someone needs medical attention after a head injury, says Greg Ayotte, a spokesperson for the Brain Injury Association of America and a cognitive rehabilitation therapist. "They're confused, they're agitated, or they might be dizzy or unresponsive," he says.
But then there's what doctors call the "talk and die" scenario, where someone seems fine, only to die hours, or sometimes even days later.
"Talk and die" can happen with several different kinds of brain injuries. In the case of epidural hematomas, the injury Richardson and Morgan had, blood pools in the area between the lining of the brain and the skull. "Fluid is building up in a contained space, creating pressure. Something's got to give, and that something is the brain," Ayotte says. If you don't get to the hospital to have surgery to drain the fluid, "the deterioration can happen very quickly."
This is where I feel lucky. I had a head injury six years ago. I hit my head so hard that I created a skull fracture so the blood had somewhere to drain, but I had months of rehabilitation and still have some problems with my vision and vestibular system. The best way it was explained to me is that if the blood is not drained it pools in your head, which is your bodies CPU, and shuts it down, sometimes quickly, sometimes slowly. It took famed Dr. Atkins 18 months to die from a closed head injury. I'm glad that Megan is alright, and I disagree with Dr. Cohen. There is no grey area. Head injuries have to be looked at, and if nothing is wrong, all the better, but letting them go can spell death. As a parent, I couldn't live with that.
A perfect day
Yesterday I wanted to spend the day in my jammy's doing nothing. I didn't do that. Instead I took Callie out to Devil's Canyon and walked for a long time enjoying nature and the beauty surrounding me. I came home and completed chores and took a very long nap. Today I carried out my plan from yesterday, though I didn't stay in my PJ's. I got up and went to a meeting, a great way to start any day. I love what Ted Danson says, "everyone should be in a 12-step program". Well put. Then I came home and proceeded to do nothing. I watched "Finding Neverland" and got to thinking about my own writing and lately my clear avoidance of any of it. I researched James Barrie after the film and discovered some interesting things about him that are true for all successful writers. Writing was his priority, and any writers priority no matter what is happening in their life. Mine is sobriety, then I give lip service to my writing. I have found that if I am dutiful and disciplined, I can have more than one priority. So for the rest of the day I have focused on it. I sent my internal editor on a long hike off a short pier and went to work on a draft that has been in mind for some time. I have to believe that it will come together...somehow. It is a story that wants to be told. It shows up in my dreams on a regular basis, it follows me through the day, and peeks around the corner when I am in the midst of avoiding it. I don't have faith that I will ever be published, that would mean I would have to show someone my work! But I have faith that I will write with zeal again, no matter what, if I show up on the page. This afternoon I wandered out to Barnes & Noble and spent a significant amount of time looking at titles and authors and spent too much money...I consider it an investment...and wanted to be on the shelves...someday. This is an almost perfect day for me. To make it perfect I would have taken Callie for a hike again, but alas it was snowing and windy. The weather is a terrific predictor of whether I will spend time on the page or not. The worse the weather, the more bored I get and more my mind wanders to all that is possible when I am alone in the room.
Wednesday, March 11, 2009
Now or Never
The above is the title of a new book by Jack Cafferty, a reporter for CNN who appears on "The Situation Room" daily. I read an article that contains an excerpt from the book. He discusses in detail his alcoholism and the last final, devastating days of drinking. I have copied a paragraph that spoke to me below. One of the things I really appreciate about "celebrities" and "people in public" discussing their issues around addiction is that it galvanizes for me that this disease does not discriminate. It really doesn't care how much money you make, your position with a company, your IQ, your social network. Addiction will take you to your knees regardless of status in the community and bank balance. I also appreciate them sharing their sagas because people who have never struggled with addiction have an incredibly hard time wrapping their heads around why someone would destroy themselves in such a manner, especially someone who appears to have it all; they should struggle with this understanding, I know this addict did for a very long time. I would never want anyone to really suffer the hell I suffered, but when others talk about their struggle with it, they reach out to the world and, my hope, is on some level, they help create a little more compassion for the person who still suffers. This is not to say that anyone should ever have to continue to live with an addict, they have to take care of themselves first, it is up to the addict to find support among other like individuals and find their own way back.
There was a relentless, unspoken tension between us caused by the chemical I was addicted to. Eventually, your personality splits apart; you're living a lie and a scary double life. It requires tremendous mental energy to stay in that game and keep living that lie, all the more so with two young kids in the house bearing witness to the worst of it. You know you're not fooling anyone, least of all your spouse. And as my ability to handle the booze diminished over time, I needed more of it, and it began to consume me. I just wanted to walk through my career and do the drinking; do the marriage and do the drinking; do the parenting and do the drinking. How many drinks do you have at dinner when you go out? Do you drink at home before you go out and have more drinks at dinner? What about after dinner? Believe it or not, these are real questions that go through the addicted mind. Not, What do I wear? Is the babysitter lined up with snacks and stuff to do with the kids? Etc. It is ALL about the drinking and where the next drink will come from, and how much we think we can get away with drinking. Cafferty captures very directly and simply the mind of an addict...everytime I read things like this, I am grateful to be sober one more day.
There was a relentless, unspoken tension between us caused by the chemical I was addicted to. Eventually, your personality splits apart; you're living a lie and a scary double life. It requires tremendous mental energy to stay in that game and keep living that lie, all the more so with two young kids in the house bearing witness to the worst of it. You know you're not fooling anyone, least of all your spouse. And as my ability to handle the booze diminished over time, I needed more of it, and it began to consume me. I just wanted to walk through my career and do the drinking; do the marriage and do the drinking; do the parenting and do the drinking. How many drinks do you have at dinner when you go out? Do you drink at home before you go out and have more drinks at dinner? What about after dinner? Believe it or not, these are real questions that go through the addicted mind. Not, What do I wear? Is the babysitter lined up with snacks and stuff to do with the kids? Etc. It is ALL about the drinking and where the next drink will come from, and how much we think we can get away with drinking. Cafferty captures very directly and simply the mind of an addict...everytime I read things like this, I am grateful to be sober one more day.
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